I don't feel like looking back at my old posts to see how much my weight changed from the last weigh in.
??9.0 weight today ( it was the same yesterday) and my total weight lost is 65.4
Ok, so for the past couple of days, I've been plagued by the reoccurring fear that my surgery won't work. I tried talking to my mom about it, but she just told me "not to be negative". While she probably said the only thing that she new how so say, it wasn't exactly what I needed to hear. I'm not being negative, I'm being CRAZY! But then, what if I'm not being crazy and I really do stop losing weight. UGH! I just don't know.
Of course I want it to work, and work well. I want to not be fat. I want be able to wear clothes and not worry about pieces of Addie sticking out. I want to be able to do all of stuff that people without any sort of weight problems/drama/issues/ etc do. I STILL want to snap my fingers and just be the weight that I want to be. All of this stuff about "appreciating the journey" is a big load of crap. Working hard for stuff is overrated. The only people who "appreciate" hard work are the people who HAVE to do it. Ask Paris Hilton or any number of trust fund babies and I'm sure they will agree with me that the "hard work/ satisfaction myth" is just something that poor saps of the word fool themselves into believing...... I JUST WANT THE WEIGHT GONE and maybe I won't be so crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!