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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

VSG surgery Pete and Repeat

??8.0

My weight is up, but honestly I feel smaller. Eating a little extra, not drinking my water like I need to, and having the Scarlet Crusade march into town, and its no wonder that my weight is up. I'm super ok with it though.

I woke up this morning and had my mouth FIXED for my Premier Protein Shake. I was motivated to start the day out right, but when I realized that I left them more than 100 miles away, my elation turned into deflation. *sigh* I've told you before that
I.
Am.
Lazy.
its a promise.....and its empty alright
If I don't have my protein shake to reach for first thing in the morning, I don't suddenly think to myself, " Self, why don't you scramble you up a healthy protein filled omelette or tuna salad?" Nah, that's too much like right. I'll cook in the evenings, but I just can't bring myself to do it in the mornings. Maybe if Santa doesn't find out that I think he needs a VSG and I find his activities with little people questionable if I'm good enough, I can ask Santa, and on on Christmas morning I can find motivation in my stocking instead of empty promises, broken records, cupcake wrappers, and dog hair.

Oh yeah! This list of things in my stocking, just jogged my memory. What in the oh-no-they-didn't hell is going on just a few blocks from my house??
Open air drug deals?.....nah
A sweat shop?.............nope
Midget porn studio?.......nyet
Puppy mill?............negative

wait for it
wait for it
wait for it

A motherfrucking, cot damaged,
CUPCAKE HAPPY HOUR!!!!!
What makes anybody in their right mind think this is ok.??? I'm telling yall that this is the work of Beelzebub himself.
In the name of all that is good, and holy, and healthy, and non panic inducing, I implore you to band together with sanctimonious, harmonious, Thelonious, pandemonious, praise and worship and rebuke the spirit of the Cupcake Demon up outta here. Yall better "re" everything up in here. Rebuke the demons, renew my strength, reactivate, reduce, reuse, recuse, readjust, reassemble, reappropriate, and recycle.

I'm out like Pete and Repeat on that damned boat.

ttyl

6 comments:

  1. the extra weight is probably just muscle! Try keeping tabs on your inches instead :)

    my last post

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thats ok! you know how you do, up 1 lb today then down 15 lbs in a few more days!!! :)
    Cot Damage! Still love that. I'm going to have to say that when I go home for Christmas. Cupcakes BE STILL!
    You are ok now, I have prophesized your cupcake admonishment. Enjoy the rest of the day!
    PS, if you do want a lil hypage, I got some i can ship on down that way!
    LETS GET HYPPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL You always make me laugh! Ha (I agree about Santa, but don't tell him)

    ReplyDelete
  4. The evil that is cupcakeries and cold stone creameries must be removed from the presence of the righteous. That's where the mantra of "I choose to not ingest these blood sugar raising, tooth rotting, heart stopping yet sinfully delicious pastries and frozen delights" must be used. Get thee hence, chefs of Satan!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Digitarii, I think I just died a little inside. LMAOWTFPWND!!!!!

    ReplyDelete

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