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Monday, December 13, 2010

VSG surgery Big things and scent


I've got something SUPER, DUPER, fantastically great that is about to come up and you want to be a FB fan and a blog/twitter follower. When I found out that it was actually going to happen, I was so excited that I actually ran in place and started waving my hands frantically. I can't tell you what it is just yet, but the first huge clue sounds like crescendo lariat trick  I'm telling you, you want to become a fan and/or a follower now.

Today didn't start out the best way that it could have. Normally I wake up and have my Premier protein shake and a Propel or water, but this morning I had a late start and barely had time to brush my teeth before my ride was here to pick me up for therapy. Since the car accident, I've been going to physical therapy and I still have a lot more to go.
Anyway, I'm laying on the traction table and there are the two women having the most inappropriate conversation in the history of all things inapproriate! Lady A was telling Lady B that she has no scent at all "down there". Lady A added, " Even after (intercourse) when you have all of them secretions and stuff, I still don't have no scent." Lady B said something to Lady A, but then Lady A replied, " You can ask any man I done ever been with that I don't have no scent at all. I was blessed like that." OMGWTFisgoingoninhere?!?!?!?! I was on my phone tweeting about this bullshit in real time. Then, Lady A turned to Lady B and said, "Mama, ..........." The rest of that sentence, whatever the hell it was, was a complete and total blur to me. As soon as I heard the word "Mama" my brain, in a state of disbelief, ceased to function. This takes inappropriateness to a level reserved for perverted, bicycle seat sniffers. That was just all the way wrong. I hope that this tasteless mother/daughter duo isn't there on Wednesday.

Well, I have some more tamales to make, so I better get off my ass and get to work.


  1. Girl! you are something! I just love you! Congrats and I be following!

  2. Wow Wow and Wow!
    I'm already a fan and a follower!
    I cant wait to see what it is!
    The mother/daughter duo thing is off the chain!
    Since you tuned it out ima tell you what happened in the conversation after the word mama...
    Mama (Waningwoman draws blank for a second or two) aye mammaaaa I cant wait until we get her outta here so that we can continue talking about this whithout her tweeting every word were saying. She thinks we dont know she is tweeting us but the camera were using while she is blanked out will be posting her pics on the table while she is now blacked out.(waning woman wakes up)

  3. Thats awesome...just awesome..Captain Inappropriate and her side kick Kid Creeper sound like they are from here in South Jersey. I love your blog *moon eyes*

    So, ummmm...whats our surprise? Does it breath?Will I need to share my litter box with it? You can tell me...


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Waning Woman is sponsored by North Texas Bariatrics


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