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Monday, July 25, 2011

Retirement Parties and Sleeve Love

Pay no mind to the brownie mix!

I was pretty busy last week. My mom had a retirement luncheon back in my hometown so I had to make my way back for that. For a post op trying to keep her eating game tight, there really isn't much in my parent's house that I can eat. I usually end up buying a lot of stuff while I'm there, but this past trip Mrs. Lazyandinefficient was actually proactive. I packed some stuff! I must say I am very proud of myself. Although
I didn't end up using any of the stuff that I packed, it's still a big step. It's far better to be prepared and not need it, than it is to need it and not be prepared. Somebody buy me a cupcake!

My little sister and I always paint the town various shades of red when I go back home. This last time was no exception. Your girl Wayonce was in the building and when I say I killed it, I murdalized it. I danced like my life depended on it....I danced like God was gonna stop making cupcakes if I missed a beat....I danced like Ethiopian food would go extinct if my feet stopped moving. I went hard like priapism and concrete boots, and when the dust settled 30 minutes later, my shirt was completely soaked...and it was cotton too. It was actually kinda gross, but I didn't care because I was having fun. That has been one of the best parts of losing weight-being able to peel back all of layers and find the me that was always hiding under there.Getting to the center of this Tootsie Pop has been an adventure to say the least.
I'm not gonna sugar coat it, I was not a happy fat! (it is a little sugar coated if I'm comparing myself to a Tootsie Pop) I think that most people who say that they are fat and happy are lying to themselves or just don't know any better because they've never felt what it's like on this side. I was tired and achy and miserable and sluggish. Life then wasn't all bad, but life is certainly better on this side. Gosh darnit, this is turning into a roses and rainbows, gay unicorn, sparkles and sequins kinda post. I'm really having an iHeartMySleeve kinda moment. I'm not going to apologize for it, damn it! This is how I'm feeling today, so that's all that matters. The Gastric Sleeve has brought about some incredibly positive changes in my life.

I heart my sleeve.
I puffy heart my sleeve.
I puffy heart with glitter heart my sleeve.
I puffy heart with glitter made out of fondant on top of a cupcake heart my sleeve.
I puffy heart with glitter made out of fondant on top of a cupcake that I ate and is now in mah belly my heart my sleeve.


  1. Hey I heart my sleeve and your sleeve and your nasty sweaty cotton coated self too!

  2. Yummmm, cupcakes. Oh what were you saying?

  3. "hard like priapism" OMG i think i just wet my pants. i have no idea what this post is about because that's all i can remember.

  4. Whats wrong with loving being healthy and vibrant? Not a thing. As long as you arent mean to your fatter self, then all is good honey. You should be proud and happy.

  5. I totally feel what you're saying. I'm at a point now, after surgery and losing almost all the weight I needed to lose, that I'm so light, so airy, so having FUN!

    I actually went to the park to teach my son how to play HANDBALL!! A sport requiring PHYSICAL movement!!!

    If this is a dream, DO NOT wake me up. EVER. I will be pissed off and spit on your cheek. Yes. It is that serious.

    I heart my DS!!!


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