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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Patron and Saints

 So let me tell yall the crazy shit right off the top. I must have pissed off the Patron Saint of the Roads cause my Black ass can't catch a break! I was rear ended on Saturday, and not in the good way. Jesus! Well, maybe I shouldn't say "Jesus". Maybe I shouldn't use any exclamatory statements that involve Judeo-Christian icons.  Jesus was a firebrand and I shouldn't really be on his bad side. I can just hear the way that people talked about Jesus back in the day.
" Ugh, he always up in hurr messin with folks. All we tryin to do is have a good time, drink a little drank, and play these dice and he come runnin up in hurr flippin tables and stuff. He really needs to chill wit all that mess!" I'm done. Stay tuned for next weeks episode of "Pookie and Quinteranetta's New Millennium Bible Interpretations" Anyway....
It was a minor, minor accident. No airbags deployed so we're all good. Just gonna take it to the body shop and let them do what they do.

....16 hours later....

Well, I'm finally back. I dropped my car off, picked up the rental, went to eat lunch with PT, shopped, shopped, and shopped. My clothes were literally falling off of me and I needed some for a special trip. Do you know where I'm going? Do you want to know? ...Hmmmm?...... Yours truly is heading to the Big Easy for the Obesity Help conference!  Did you hear that? If you're there, you will actually get to see my entire face for the low, low price of 24.99. Anyway, you can't call yourself the Queen of all Black People, Wayonce, God's Gift to the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy, the Patron Saint of All Things Cake, the Dancing Queen, the..the....the and step up in New Orleans looking a hot ass mess. If you declare that you are indeed the shit, you better be THE shit and not A shit and certainly not AN shit. Soooo I have assembled an Antoine Merriweather approved, 3 snaps in a Z formation, , clutch yo pearls wardrobe Gah-ron-teed (that's my Louisiana accent) to induce the fever. I'm so ready! I hope New Orleans is like a Zatarains' commerical.
...4 hours later....

This has to be the most piecemeal blog entry I've ever composed. I'm so busy washing clothes and all that jazz that I've stopped and started this thing more times than I can count. Oh yeah, both Premier Nutrition and Chike sent me out some stuff, but because of Ramadan I wasn't able to review the products. So in the next few weeks keep your eyeses peeled for these reviews. Oh yeah, a little birdie told me a secret. If you like Vanilla Premier RTD shakes, they will be making a limited, one time run at Costco on Sept. 26th so stock up if you love it. Ha! They're like the McRib of the ready to drink protein world.

Well, its 3:48 so I'm about to finally get off of my bum and get off of this damn computer.


  1. I wish I could come meet you in the big easy!! I am so broke for several reasons (one of which I just posted about lol). Just so you know you need to actually write for someone because you are too hilarious in your writing style. I love it :)

  2. I'm so glad you're ok. I hope you're having a great time. miss u much. looking forward to your review. hugs baby!


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