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Friday, September 6, 2013

Phoenix, Queens, and Ameriwell Bariatrics

Long time no see!
 Phoenix was a blizzast! I had so much fun I was ready to leave and whining like a stressed out 3yo in need of a sippy cup, a quiet corner, AND a spanking the last night I was there. Y'all know I do not know how to act. My stunt queen swag was on full attack. I never thought that I would be funned out, though.

I went and got mahself a lotta edgeumacation in the general and breakout sessions. One of my absolute favorite sessions was with Gary Foster, Weighing Success Beyond the Scale: Identifying and Maintaining a Healthy Weight. he addressed a ton of great points in his discussion and I said that he may have been the best "motivation" speaker there. I use quotes because he wasn't there in that capacity, he is doctor.
This is one point that he touched on: Often you hear people say, "Well, I want to weight what I weighed when I was in college/got married/graduated/before I had my kids when I was stripping" etc.
I have a newsflash for you! You may not necessarily be able to weigh what you weighed then because chances are your life is radically different than it was back in the day. 
ding, ding, ding, ding! Bells should be ringing, lights should be going off, and you should be well into your Oprah "aha moment" experience.
You could weight what you weighed then because you didn't have kids, a husband, a wife, a mortgage, a real job, pets, a 401k, crazy in laws, soccer parent duties, etc. You might have been finer than frog hair split three ways your senior year in college and you're STRUGGLING to see that weight again 10-20 years after the fact. Don't feel bad about not being able to attain that. I'm here to tell you that it is ok to be as fine as frog hair (not split) or even just a big toe hair. Me? I'm as fine as am octopus hair and I got the pics to prove it.

Doncha wish yo eyebrows was hot like mine
I told you I had pics to prove it. Although it has been a few years since I channeled my inner queen with such fervent ferocity, the good samaritans at the OAC gave me a venue to blow the dust off of my makeup sticks and my can of aquanet to bring you the timeless beauty you see above. Talk about fishy realness.
Hastag fabulous!
Hashtag  werk!
Hashtag FWM!
Hastag ###!
When Maleficent looks in the mirror and asks who is the fairest of them all, the mirror looks at her and just flashes a picture of my awesome. #KillYoself  I'm totally mashing up my Disney movies right now. Anywhoo.
Seriously though, my Ursula the Sea Witch costume.....wait, I do it a disservice my calling it a costume. Let me try again...ahem
Seriously though. the Ursula the Sea Witch experience I was serving up was so "turnt up" that I actually won a registration to next years conference in Orlando. I am officially the first person registered for #ymw2014! I'd like to officially thank the academy, drag queens everywhere, and Black hair stores run my Asians.

While in Phoenix, I got to connect with one of my favorite vendors, Ameriwell Bariatrics. They have two really cool products, an effervescent calcium and a gelatin multivitamin. They make taking your vitamins fun! My friend Shana, Lady Gaga in the picture above, said of the calcium "It is like a parade of bubbly lemonheads in my mouth"

And you can try some yourself because they have generously offered up a prize box packed with goodies for fans and readers!

I'm using RaffleCopter so that you have a NUMBER of chances to enter. The only one that is mandatory, is leaving a blog comment. Also, keep your eyes peeled for extra chances to win by commenting on official entry threads on my Facebook Fan Page. RaffleCopter will be there too. Look for the new tab.

Have fun and be safe you cool kids.
I'm out like Miley's ass.

a Rafflecopter giveaway


  1. OMG, you DO have a face, and a beautiful one at that (niiiiice makeup job) and congrats on winning attendance for next year. You f'ing rock WW!

    So I just posted some sobering stats on losing weight (but I kinda like your explanation better, lol) but it's all good...saying some of the same stuff.

    And finally black hair store run by asians...O M G, thank you for making me laugh!! Hahahaha!

  2. OMG out like mileys ass. Oprah aha moment. You are fantastic. Look forward to reading more

  3. Miley's ass lmao...u a trip.

  4. I so wish I had gotten to go to Phoenix. But I am going to Orlando come hell or high water. Would love to meet you again - we met in NOLA at the end of the conference.

  5. Great job. I'm glad you had fun

  6. Glad we finally got to meet, even if briefly. Great to hear about the convention since I couldn't go!


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Waning Woman is sponsored by North Texas Bariatrics


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