Damn, how in the hell did I miss my surgiversary yesterday?!?! I looked up at the calendar today and was completely aghast that I could forget such a big event in my life.
My stomach is no longer Sleevie Wonder because it is not a separate thing from me. It finally feels like it is part of me.
Now that I'm not actively losing weight and fighting these 10 lbs of regain like every red blooded woman on the planet, I don't feel extraordinarily special. Nothing to see here folks!
The shine has worn off, the glitter is in an ever fading trail behind me. It's not exciting.
All of the things that I did to lose weight are now the things that I have to do just to maintain my weight. It is very easy to stay motivated when I seeing smaller numbers and newer sizes. It is a lot less easy to maintain that enthusiasm when my ass is stagnant. And according to some famous person, isn't that the definition of insanity?! Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
Reaching goal and maintaing is actually kind of meh.
This is not to say that I am unhappy with where I am. I feel fantastic, most day actually think I look fantastic, and throughout all of this I've managed to pick up some fantastic friends along the way.
Part of the reason that I have been so successful is my real life, Dallas area support group, After the Cut. There are others that are trying to get a handle on serious regain, while I have just ten pounds. I can still wear all of the clothes in my closet. Perspective is everything.
From this vantage point I see a life that is mine for the taking because I'm not trapped in a body afflicted by obesity.
I'll cry, feel unpretty, feel fearless, feel sad, feel old, feel young, feel wore out, but most importantly there will be days where the shine hasn't gone anywhere and the glitter will be thick as a red carpet and I'll be walking on that.
Thank you for sharing these 4 years with me.