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Monday, October 20, 2014

the-not-so-secret secrets of my success

I received an email that said this the other day...
"Dear Ms. Waning Woman,
While searching for the most wonderfullest, educatedest, best lookingest bloggers on the World Wide Web, we found you! We would like for you to write a blog post about the ancient Chinese secrets that give you unlimited awesomeness. We'll pay you in cupcakes and glitter heels."
Andrea at Oscar Insurance"
OK, so it didn't happen quiiiite like that, but you know me and my fits of fancy (cue Iggy Azalea song right here). It was more along the lines of, " We're reaching out to a few bloggers and we want to see the ways that they stay healthy." Since I'm almost 5 years post op and still making Sleevie Wonder work for me, I figured that this would be a great time to blog about how I'm doing in maintenance.
Look at me with Michelle of The World According to Eggface.

I'm doing great! I'm not gonna mince words or play it down. No modesty here for, ya girl. I'm rocking this maintenance thing like a sold out Aerosmith concert.

I'm pretty loose with the rules, and in fact, I don't like following any rules at all. I thought that I didn't have any hard and fast rules, but after sitting up and thinking about it, I actually do. These things work for me, so your mileage may vary.

1. One thing I hardly ever do, almost never, is drink my calories. 
When I do have a soda, it's Coke Zero, Topo Chico, or other no-cal/low-cal drink. I'm actually getting away from artificial sweeteners so I'm very partial to LaCroix, Topo Chico, or other sparkling waters.

I enjoy having a grown folks drink as much as the next person, but you'll never see me chugging down a sugar laden mixed drink. My go to is vodka and club soda with a twist of lime or a dirty martini. Very low carb and low cal as far as libations go.

2.  I'm low carb 85% of the time.
For lunch, I'll usually pack my Thermos with protein, have a few grape tomatoes on the side and that will be it. On the days that I don't pack my lunch, I'll hit up the Mexican grocery store and get carne guisda or something sufficiently delicious and meat only. Full fat errhthang is the only thing that works for me.
On weekends I'm more liberal and those are the days that I'll have something delicious like homemade risotto or cupcakes. Mmmm. Hurry up and get here, Saturday!

3. I have breakfast everyday.
This is one I actually thought I didn't do because I don't eat my breakfast, I drink my breakfast. I'll whip up a shake with cashew milk, protein powder and drink it on my way work. On the 3-snooze-button-wash-my-underarms-over-the-sink-mornings, I keep ready to drink shakes on hand so that I always have something.

4. I'm a food snob.
If something doesn't make me happy, I don't eat it. I learned the hard way that doing that means you'll just eat and eat and eat because you're trying to satiate that craving. I skip all of that, and just get what I want. In a society where women are often conditioned to just go with the flow and make people happy, it's not always easy to tell the waitress, " I'm not eating this because I don't like it." You can come off as stuck up, selfish, all kinds of negatives. But you know what? I don't compromise on this anymore because I have to live with me and my body. So because I know what I like and what makes me happy, I eat that. I don't eat to live, I live to eat. I love full fat cheeses, roasted veggies, marbled steaks, good olive oil, crusty breads, olives and I don't apologize.

This isn't everything, but these few things are a big part of the reason that I'm a success.  Until I started penning this post, I didn't actually realize that I have my "things".  Hmph. Now you can have them too, if you promise to holler "Waning" every single time somebody tells you that you look good. Also, if you're in the markers for health insurance in the New York, New Jersey area, check out Oscar, "The New Kid That May Change Health Insurance," according to Forbes magazine.
Remember to like that FB fan page!

Waning Woman is sponsored by North Texas Bariatrics


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